So remember when I mentioned to you that the other night Bobby and I went out to dinner and it was steeped in tradition? We knew what to expect from the service, we knew what to expect from the food quality, and we knew we would fully enjoy the meal.
However, the following anecdote I did not expect: We got in the car to go home. As expected, Bobby started fiddling with the radio because, as expected, he could not find anything acceptable to listen to. All of a sudden he found a new radio station which refers to itself as "Birmingham's Classic Hip-Hop". He then started singing along to NWA's "Boyz 'N Da Hood". As in Every...single...word..."Cause the boys in the hood are always hard / you come talkin' that trash, we'll pull ya car / knowin' nutin' in life but to be legit / don't quote me boy 'cause I ain't said $h*t."
I was like (~tires screeching~) WHAT? He was fist pumping and all. I have never seen this side of him. He could tell I was a little shocked and he looked over at me and said "Blog about this!!!"
That's something I love about Bobby. When we first fell in love, I was thirsty to know everything about him. I loved just being around him because he always managed to make me smile and laugh. Over the years, the smiles have not faded, but I, like so many others, have come to expect certain behaviors and their shock or glee values have decreased a little. I know, sad, right?
That spur-of-the-moment performance may have been the highlight of the night for me. And yes, Bobby, I am blogging about it. You see, if you want to keep a relationship fresh, you have to still manage to surprise the other person from time to time. Bobby is good at surprises, but I am bad at being patient enough for them to come along.
I expect certain behaviors. If I know Bobby has the house to himself one afternoon, I expect he will take a nap. From time to time he will surprise me by cooking a dinner or folding a load of clothes. Bobby expects me to forget to run an errand he has asked me about. From time to time I will surprise him by doing it the first time he asks. I expect that holidays, birthdays, and anniversaries are no big deal and I rarely expect flowers. But when they do get delivered, I am happily surprised.
In fact, I feel certain that Bobby surprises me more than I surprise him, now that I'm actually typing. So today I challenge myself and all of you reading to surprise the one you love. It doesn't have to be monetary. You can let your guard down and be vulnerably funny or honest. You can do one of the honey-dos from the ever present list. Have dinner cooked. Volunteer to wash dishes. Fill his car up with gas the next time you borrow it. But more than anything else, if you expect happiness, you have to give happiness first.